Thursday, December 09, 2010

1-800-shut the phuk up and die

captain'z blog. stardate 4orty6ix and 2: this jg wentworth idiot needz to be shot. what a stupid asshole. showing people yelling 'it's my money, and i need it now' from their windowz, over and over again, first of all, ok, we get it, shut up. once iz enuph. secondly, you know this world az well az i do. people steal money. you don't shout anything about money from your window. what a stupid asshole. you've lived a long and... obviously prosperous life, it's time to die. and people singing opera style about money, on a bus? come on. first of all, no one likes opera anymore, asshole, only you, cauze you're an old fart. shut the phuk up, no one wants to hear that shyt, i don't care how much you're paying them, retard, you're a phuking whore. and secondly, everyone'z scared of eachother on a bus, the homie sitting next to you haz a gun in hiz pocket, shut the phuk up. what an idiot. and on another note, if the military iz going to be firing 'flarez' into the sky at night, why don't they warn us ahead of time, saying 'we're gonna be firing 'flarez' into the sky', so we don't think it's a goddamn fuo all the time. and that's beside the fact that flarez look nuthing like a goddamn fuo. how stupid do they think we are? well, if we're all watching the jg wentworth commercialz... i guess that question haz been answered. phuking moronz. one more thing... izn't it odd how 'moron' and 'mormon' are spelled so similar. i saw a sign yesterday that said 'i'm a mormon', and when i just glanced at it, i sure thought it said 'i'm a moron'. like that's something you'd like to advertize... well... once again, my foot's in my mouth. i'm a moron. to order now, call one, eighthundred, moronik. while suppliez last. batteriez not included.

Monday, November 29, 2010

to be scene

('hey you, standing naked in the rayne, can you touch me?')

what iz it about some people
who want to be seen
to be nude
in publik
for random anonymous strangerz to see
for all the world to see
that's right, i said it
i started off with a shock
the ultimate intimacy of anonymity
people who need that
who feed on that
who thrive on that
who get high on that
to share the most sacred
in a way much more sacred
something so real
you can pheel it
when your heart poundz
when your skin shinez in the wind
when some people fear, and run
and some people have such an urge
to join you
to see you
to touch you
to phuk you
right there in the street
to do something so daring
so thrilling
so powerful
to do something... so... natural
to pheel... alive...
scared and brave at the same time
the ultimate cure for loneliness
once you've tasted something so real
it's the only real thing in the world
it's the only time you pheel
to be so... fearless
to pheel something so strong
so vivid
so alive
so real
it's the only real we'll ever know
to be seen az 'such a sin'
until you try it
just like pot... or sex... or insanity...
when you realize it's more sane
than what they tell you
it's a trick
to be forced
to believe in a world you don't agree with
to agree with a world you don't believe in
to be forced to see... unreality
to think it's real, until you see real
and then, to know, the true sanity
and to try to communicate it
to thoze who are still... asleep
to shock someone awake
by revealing the most intimate
sensual
electrik
addictive
contagious
of all secrets
of all sinz
of all pheelingz
of all curez
to shed that skin of rulez and conformity
pheelz so phuking real
illuminating
awakening
exhilerating
liberating
you pheel reborn
to shed that clothing of liez and deceit
to buy their lie, and ask for a receipt
so you can return it
and tell them where to stick it
becauze you're free now
and you need no more clothing of fear
you only need the pounding heartbeat
you only need... more
go ahead...
surrender
to the wind
the sun
the 3yez
let it go
and see how having nuthing
could mean having everything
see what they don't want you to see
and show them what they don't want to see
and spread that pheeling like a virus
a plague for the sleeping
the fearful
the slumber itself
try it, and know it
know that it's the greatest high
to make someone ask why
the truth iz simply, you cannot lie
ever again
once you've found truth
that's all there iz
az vivid az the air on your flesh
where it's 'not suppozed to be'
let the sun shine there
show theze indoor addicts
theze fearful wimps
they can't have all the phun
go ahead
take it off
and take a walk
like walking barefoot in the grass
bring bæuty back in style
bring sex back in style
show them a real wardrobe malfunction
flawed systemz will malfunction
how some can find it so ugly
iz becauze they're ugly
they're ashamed
and if they can't do it
then you shouldn't be able to either
phuk that
don't let anyone tell you that
don't let anyone press their fearz onto you
instead, press your flesh against them
reinvent touch
reinvent passion
never hide your phire again
you were born with bæutiphul flesh
show it off
take it off
and take a walk
rediscover unlimited freedom
be proud of the skin you're in

Monday, November 22, 2010

a short note to grandma...

you're going to hell, for all the shyt you've done in your life. you're the most cold, heartless, evil bitch i've ever known. god doezn't want you in heaven, you really think you're going to heaven? satan'z going to ask you, why did you have to be so hateful. you didn't give a phuk that your daughter, the only one of your four children who cared about you, waz bedridden. you didn't care. you were too hateful to care. you lived a life with hatred in your heart. i've done better shyt in my life than you've ever done. i'm going to heaven, and i don't even believe in heaven. you're the one who believez in heaven, but i think that's just a put on. you know who you really are. and i know who you really are. you're going to hell, so you can pheel the pain that you've inflicted on people during your whole life, tenfold, even your own daughter. and you know exactly what you're doing to her. you may have her fooled, but not me. i hope, when you're burning in the hell you believe in, that you hear that, over and over again. and then, you'll know who i really am.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

current winamp playlist

phuk that last playlist.
this iz october twentyeight, nine:forty pm.

my current winamp playlist, for andy.
sorted alphabetikally, playing on random.

138 tracks in playlist, average track length: 5:22
playlist length: 12 hours 21 minutes 29 seconds

1. Alice In Chains - Brush Away (3:24)
2. Alice In Chains - Got Me Wrong (4:09)
3. Alice In Chains - No Excuses (4:17)
4. Alice In Chains - Private Hell (5:38)
5. Alice In Chains - Rotten Apple (6:58)
6. Alice In Chains - Would? (3:27)
7. Altered State - Ghost Beside My Bed (5:50)
8. Bill Hicks - People Who Hate People (0:32)
9. Black Label Society - Stillborn (3:15)
10. Children of Bodom - Angels Don't Kill (5:13)
11. Chimaira - Down Again (4:20)
12. Chimaira - Pure Hatred (4:18)
13. City of Fire - Hollow Land (4:51)
14. Cradle of Filth - Nymphetamine (Fix) (5:02)
15. Cradle of Filth - The Death of Love (7:13)
16. Danzig - Cantspeak (4:06)
17. deftones - diamond eyes (3:08)
18. deftones - digital bath (4:15)
19. deftones - lifter (4:43)
20. deftones - minerva (4:17)
21. deftones - minus blindfold (4:04)
22. deftones - one weak (4:28)
23. deftones - root (3:41)
24. deftones - rx queen (4:27)
25. Delain - Shattered (4:19)
26. Delain - The Gathering (3:34)
27. Devin Townsend Band - Deadhead (8:05)
28. Devin Townsend Project - Bend It Like Bender! (3:35)
29. Down - Jail (5:17)
30. Down - Landing on the Mountains of Meggido (7:48)
31. Down - Nothing in Return (Walk Away) (8:54)
32. Epica - Kingdom Of Heaven (13:35)
33. Fear Factory - Body Hammer (5:05)
34. Fear Factory - Demanufacture (4:13)
35. Fear Factory - Pisschrist (5:25)
36. Fear Factory - Replica (3:56)
37. Fear Factory - Self Bias Resistor (5:11)
38. Fear Factory - Slave Labor (3:53)
39. Fear Factory - Zero Signal (5:57)
40. Gary Numan - My Breathing (6:41)
41. Godspeed - Sabbath Bloody Sabbath (5:36)
42. Jerry Cantrell - Angel Eyes (4:44)
43. Lacuna Coil - Our Truth (4:02)
44. Life of Agony - Let's Pretend (3:57)
45. Life of Agony - Lost at 22 (3:40)
46. Life of Agony - Seasons (5:37)
47. Life of Agony - Strung Out (3:59)
48. Life of Agony - Ugly (5:46)
49. Machine Head - A Thousand Lies (6:15)
50. Machine Head - Block (4:59)
51. Machine Head - Blood Of The Zodiac (6:37)
52. Machine Head - Davidian (4:58)
53. Machine Head - Deafening Silence (5:33)
54. Machine Head - Descend The Shades Of Night (7:46)
55. Machine Head - Exhale The Vile (4:56)
56. Machine Head - Old (4:07)
57. Machines of Loving Grace - Golgotha Tenement Blues (4:01)
58. Magenta - Eccentricity (3:33)
59. Medicine - Time Baby III (3:52)
60. Metallica - ...And Justice for All (9:45)
61. Metallica - Fade to Black (6:57)
62. Metallica - My Friend of Misery (6:49)
63. Metallica - Welcome Home (Sanitarium) (6:27)
64. Mötley Crüe - Face Down In The Dirt (3:44)
65. Mötley Crüe - Just Another Psycho (3:36)
66. Mötley Crüe - Saints Of Los Angeles (3:40)
67. Mouth Music - Tomorrow (5:39)
68. Mudvayne - Not Falling (4:03)
69. Mudvayne - World So Cold (5:39)
70. Ocean Machine - Bastard (10:17)
71. Ocean Machine - Life (4:31)
72. Ocean Machine - Night (4:45)
73. Opeth - Blackwater Park (12:05)
74. Opeth - Demon of the Fall (6:13)
75. Opeth - Master's Apprentices (10:32)
76. Opeth - Remember Tomorrow (5:00)
77. Opeth - Serenity Painted Death (9:13)
78. Opeth - Would? (3:43)
79. Ozzy Osbourne - Diary of a Madman (6:15)
80. Ozzy Osbourne - Don't Blame Me (4:58)
81. Ozzy Osbourne - Fire in the Sky (6:24)
82. Ozzy Osbourne - No More Tears (7:24)
83. Ozzy Osbourne - Road to Nowhere (5:12)
84. Ozzy Osbourne - You Can't Kill Rock and Roll (6:59)
85. Pantera - Floods (6:59)
86. Pantera - Shedding Skin (5:36)
87. Sentenced - Excuse me while I kill myself (3:53)
88. Shadows Fall - Welcome To The Machine (5:05)
89. Skinlab - Anthem for a Fallen Star (3:41)
90. Slayer - In the Name of God (3:38)
91. Soilwork - 20 More Miles (4:38)
92. Soilwork - Enter Dog Of Pavlov (5:36)
93. Soilwork - Let This River Flow (5:20)
94. Soilwork - Nerve (3:38)
95. Sonic Syndicate - Affliction (5:13)
96. Sonic Syndicate - Burn This City (3:29)
97. Sonic Syndicate - My Escape (4:10)
98. Sonic Syndicate - My Own Life (3:46)
99. Sonic Syndicate - Only Inhuman (4:13)
100. SR-71 - Let It Whip (3:53)
101. Stone Temple Pilots - Sin (7:24)
102. Stone Temple Pilots - Where the River Goes (8:25)
103. Strapping Young Lad - Centipede (7:56)
104. Strapping Young Lad - Japan (5:18)
105. T ò ó L - 4ørty6ix and ² (6:04)
106. T ò ó L - Eulogy (8:28)
107. T ò ó L - H. (6:07)
108. T ò ó L - Stinkfist (5:11)
109. t.A.T.u. - All The Things She Said (3:34)
110. t.A.T.u. - Clowns (Can You See Me Now) (3:12)
111. t.A.T.u. - How Soon Is Now? (3:17)
112. t.A.T.u. - Show Me Love (Extended) (5:10)
113. Testament - Electric Crown (5:58)
114. Testament - The Legacy (5:31)
115. Testament - Troubled Dreams (5:02)
116. Testament - True Believer (3:36)
117. The Cure - Burn (6:39)
118. Timothy Leary - Eternal Note (5:30)
119. Timothy Leary - Lion's Mouth (10:15)
120. Tool - Opiate (5:23)
121. Tool - Sober (5:06)
122. Tool - Swamp Song (5:31)
123. Tristeza - Are We People (4:04)
124. Tristeza - Auroura Borealis (4:40)
125. Tristeza - Building Peaks (4:51)
126. Tristeza - Chiaroscuro (6:22)
127. Tristeza - I am a Cheetah (5:27)
128. Tristeza - Opiate Slopes (5:37)
129. Tristeza - Respirá (4:37)
130. Tristeza - Shifty Drifty (3:46)
131. Type O Negative - (We Were) Electrocute (6:38)
132. Type O Negative - Everything Dies (7:43)
133. Type O Negative - In Praise of Bacchus (7:36)
134. Type O Negative - Love You to Death (7:08)
135. Vision of Disorder - Living to Die (4:06)
136. White Zombie - Cannibal Girls (3:52)
137. White Zombie - More Human than Human (4:28)
138. Within Temptation - Our Solemn Hour (4:17)

Thursday, March 18, 2010

painkiller

i'm so syck of stupid people
syck of being treated like shyt

a pill can't make you real
make you pheel something
make you something you're not
it can only make you fake
make you think unnaturally
once you're depressed
you're alwayz depressed
happiness iz an illuzion
it's all you can do to be content
but they try to make you docile
complacency iz their reality

lozing my girl, and my children
haz made me a god of hatred
taught me to embrace my anger
my advertizement iz suicide
to watch everyone around me die
my message iz 'kill yourself'
put yourself out of my mizery

the tablez of fate are turning
you wanted to walk all over me
now i'm walking all over you
i've lost all respect for humanity
and now i just see a red glow
bleeding over this dying horizon
like a river of my old tearz
killing everything in its path
bringing night to your final day
turning colour to a mizerable grey
and hatred iz all that survivez

now look up at this burning sky
and realize, there'z no one coming
there'z nuthing there to save you
just cloze your 3yez, and drift away
let this pathetik world of pain die

now, did thoze pillz really help?
did spreading hatred work for you
did being fake open up your life
did shytting on me prove it true
waz taking my children necessary
i bet if you had known all this
it might not have ended this way
but you choze to ignore the truth
you choze to shyt all over people
now you can see where it got you
in your last moment, say goodbye