you're broken

great, now i can't access my wordpress blog either. what the fuck is going on, is anyone else noticing that our electronics are working less and less, and being less and less reliable and dependable, and less and less functional, making us less and less functional. am i the only fucking one! i refuse to believe that! i can't get onto my fucking wordpress blog, i'm losing every writing outlet i have. there's no one i can fucking call. god, i fucking hate you.

september nineteen

here's my morning. again. walk to the mcdonald's to take a shit. now, i have to wait about five minutes. i finally go in, and the whole world of idiots and selfish, impatient, greedy fucks walk in and start bitching. did i go in and bitch at the last guy? no. i finally get in there, i get one minute. some guy walks in, asks me, i say 'i just got in here, but i'll try to hurry'. he walks out, some other idiot walks in asking, i say again, 'i just got in here, but i'll try to hurry'. he mumbles something untranslatable about waiting, i said i had to wait, too. he didn't care. some other guy walks in, apparently works here, asks the guy waiting how long he's been waiting, he says about seven minutes. i said bullshit, he's only been in here for less than a minute, there's no need to lie. the employee stands there, and says 'no, everyone has a right to take a shit'. proper lingo for a mcdonald's employee. what, was he quoting earnest hemmingway? douchebag. after saying that, the employee stands there, and gives me... literally, i shit you not, pardon the pun... one more minute... i could have timed it on my phone, one more minute, and then bangs on the door, starts pounding frantically on the door, saying, 'okay, your time's up, get the fuck out'. uh... i could have him fired for that, i'm sure. i've never known another human who can drop a turd in one minute flat, and walk out the door, what the fuck is wrong with you robotic heartless clones. is your hardware designed to drop turds that quick? i'm a human. i should rephrase that. unlike you, i'm a human. i walk out of the stall, and there are three guys all crammed in that one tiny bathroom, waiting, and socializing. top marks, gentlemen. bravo. hope someone does that to you... or is that why you treat me that way. is that courtesy these days. is that your standard, your norm, you all treat everyone like shit, and expect to go on walking. because you're all just minute turds, shitting out little beibers, cloning eachother every minute. eat mcdonald's, shit where you eat, and get on with your credit card. no idea why i fucking hate you.

then, i sit here on my laptop, get on the wifi, and i go to meetup.com, since i can't do facebook anymore. and i type in words to search for groups of people like me, so i type in consciousness, all it brings up is stupid looking meditation groups. i type in evolution, all it brings up is atheists and skeptics. i type in intellect, all it brings up is yoga. i type in mensa, it only brings up three groups, one of them is 'i'm a cool nerd'. obviously it's not in style to have a massive brain these days. you'll never figure out who i am and why i hate you. but i panhandled thirty six bucks last night. then i bought a hot chocolate and a couple bowls of cereal, which cost me eight bucks, leaving me with twenty four, so i'll try to use that today, and my two bus tokens, to get down to santa monica, which i really didn't want to do, from the looks of google maps, there's only the one library, it's not close enough to venice beach and the hippies to get weed, and the venice library close to the hippies, once you walk past that library back toward los angeles, there's nothing for miles, no stores, no restrooms, nothing. so if i go to santa monica, i'm basically fucked. i need to find the free meals in that area, the shelters, the areas to hang around, where the hippies are... but i only need weed from that, what i'm really trying to do right now, is find metal people with metal balls to start a metal band. i have yet to build up the motivation to do the open mic, and can't find anyone to help me with that, so fuck you all. you don't want me to get on stage, i won't get on stage, and maybe someday you'll never get to see all the shit in my head, and then hopefully, i'll die... which i'm hoping for soon, cause i can't take this shit any longer, i refuse to live on a planet overrun with this much meth and idiots, hell, i refuse to have anything to do with a world that ever had anything to do with drugs like that. when are you going to figure that out, you human fucking turds. turds with legs, born in under a minute, cloned freshly each morning by your favourite local cancer burger chain, then they'll charge you eight bucks for whatever tiny little thing you eat. that's the single serving life and what it's become. now you have to fit into their robotic single serving limitations and restrictions, and if the packaging is too small for you, you're fucked. your time's up, get the fuck out of the restroom.

i've heard of 'shit or get off the pot', but that's just fucking childish. there's no excuse for you.

last night, i watched some guy get kicked in the head once, and it knocked him out.
about a month ago, i got kicked in the head twice, it didn't even pop my neck.

pussy.

dinner thoughts

all i can do is write. i think skynyrd said that once. i can't stand this anymore. i don't know what to do, or who to talk to, or where to go. i can't find any potheads that know how to share. i can't get a second to think. i can't find anyone with a heart, and i honestly don't know why i'm still looking, i should have given up by now. i know i'll never find what i need. there's no point.

but i have to think anyway. where do i go. i need a place where there are three free meals a day, possible housing, and most importantly, a good ratio of potheads who know how to share, versus any risk of death. i'm trying to stay away from downtown. if someone could just take me away from here, there's nothing here for me, i'm not accomplishing anything.

fuck it, finally stoned.

goddamnit.

what do i want to do.

i picture myself standing on a stage. i've just shocked the audience by telling them i'm bill hicks, and i reach back to the wall behind me, and hit the wall, and just appears on the wall,

© 1995 Bill Hicks

i know what i need to make that happen. how do i meet my heroes. the still living ones.

that right there is a magic trick. for that, i need penn and teller. they're in vegas.

why can you not contact any of these people online, what good is the internet.

who all is in los angeles that i know of. otep shamaya, at least. i know maria brink and in this moment are here. that's her band, for the idiots reading this. who else. los angeles metal bands, i'd have to look them up on wikipedia, i can't remember them all.

this is what i know metal band wise. swedish bands: soilwork, sonic syndicate, in flames, meshuggah, scar symmetry... italian bands: disarmonia mundi, lacuna coil, raintime (split). canadian bands: devin townsend, the birthday massacre, the agonist... i used to know so much more. i know machine head is in oakland, i went there and there was nothing. fear factory, i forget where they are, possibly here. they just released a new album, they're on tour. who else. metal bands, come on, i impressed my wife with this knowledge. sixty thousand albums i had. i know i know them, but i can never list them all at once. when i hear the band name, i know everything about them... or i knew.

comedians... i don't know where most of them are from. they all constantly tour cause there's no guitars for them to track.

scientists, i have no clue where any of them are, for all i know, they're all in sveeden fuckin' with that neutron collider thing, whatever the fuck, i don't keep up on much science, cause what's there to keep up on, i studied history, and that's all they're diggin' in anyway, they still don't know what the fuck forward is, all they see is robots. they work with too many chemicals. that's why they need psychedelic. so before i can even translate to a scientist, i need to start my religion.

what the fuck do i do first? i just need to get attention, and enough money to start something.

easiest ways to get attention quick, open mic at laugh factory, or metal band, that's all i've come up with so far, people don't read. and i don't have enough money yet to record any video or find a book publisher. i don't know where to go to start my own religion, and i still haven't found any computer programmers who give a shit about my ozztek idea, they all think they're smarter than me, and tell me it can't be done. fuck you, anything can be done, i know this can be designed, i see it in my head, i know what it is, i know how to use it, how it works... you fuckin' design the thing, you speak its language, although, essentially, it needs to be built on its own new language, that we also speak, that's my vision. my vision is every step past the first one, i've never been able to see the first step. all i can come up with is open mic. but damned if i can find the motivation to do that one, with their fucking 'sign up next week' shit, the most discouraging idea possible. wait in line all day twosday to sign up, then come back next week to see if you're on the list yet. the fuck you, man, goddamnit, what asshole came up with that. no, if you're there, you go on stage. that's fuckin' just duh law. jesus. open the fucking mic, that's what it's fucking called. do i have to find a smaller club, that does more poetry and shit. i'll google the other comedy places here, and try going to them, but i cannot walk that far. i need more opportunity to work on the shit, and ask someone before making a fool of myself that way. there are too many other ideas at stake here to fuck up on that one first.

ideas... metal band, books, movies of all sorts and lengths... even just my albums are different concepts and different lengths and things, and they grow and evolve, like metamorphosis, someday i want to play that album in this big natural setting with big fucking speakers coming out of the earth, that really pound the shit out of you, and metamorphosis turns into this trippy day long psychedelic metal musical thing... well... fuck it, why go off on that one, no one gives a shit.

fuck it, ideas in order of what i can do first, at least...

open mic.
metal band. first album, first shows.
then get a book out. at least one, if i can have someone just start recording me, and publish some of the shit in some sensible order. cause it's all coming out of me in fragments and shit.

then what. then, i have to be fucking quick, actually, no, immediately when the metal band starts making enough money, i need to hire people and start working on creating ozztek industries.

and while doing that, i need to simultaneously get working on the religion deal, i know i need to do those two ideas at the same time. that's the vision, they're two things... well...

the religion, i need to publish a book about it, with all the information in some good order. it needs to state that i am the dividing line between psychedelic and psychotic states of mind. i am drawing the line where i think it should be drawn, where it needs to be drawn. once i do that, i can start building the community, and attract all the homeless people there, and get them away from psychotic, which will be hard with so many psychotic idiots hating me, to keep them away from the central core of strictly psychedelic... using no weapons. yeah, figure that one out.

i have. it's all in my visions, i've seen basically every possible outcome, all the fragment possibilities, any little thing that could possibly go wrong at any moment, i've not only seen the entire fractal, i've spent my life studying it. i know it well, except for that first step for me. i don't know what happens, what's the first thing to get me onto the path, it's eluded me for too many years, i should have hit something when i was eighteen or twenty. no one knows anymore, but that's why twenty three was so hard to handle, i was lost. banging into this head, chiseling away, and finding nothing but concrete, where is the brain. how do i strike that gold.

i cannot get anyone's attention. they're all numb, controlled, zombies with opinions, not hearts.

i don't know what else to say. i'm hungry.

still thinking alone

since i'm locked out of my facebook, i need to just keep writing. i need to get all my thoughts out. i walked the mile from mcdonald's to the library, asked every pothead looking creature along the way if they could spare some weed. i'm still sober. i fucking hate you people. the people at the free dinner at sycamore and romaine refuse to help me, i keep asking and begging. i don't know where to go to find friendly people. i've tried searching facebook for los angeles potheads, metalheads. what the fuck else am i supposed to do.

i don't want to make friends with people who play videogames.
i don't want to be friends with people who like anime.
i don't want people who do drugs to be my friends.
i don't want to be friends with people who like rap or popular music.
i don't want my friends to push their music choices onto me.
i want friends who are kind enough to keep me stoned when i need it.
i want friends who appreciate my taste in music.
i want friends who don't try to change me, or tell me what's wrong with me.
where are these people.

i want high tech metalhead geek friends who smoke a ton of weed.
i know there are alot of you who exist, where do i find you.

i know among you, there are at least a few who don't like videogames.
there is at least one of you who does not have a job, nor do you want one.
hello, i'm your next good friend, would you like to hang out and get stoned.
we could talk about how much we mutually hate clones and credit cards.

i can't use facebook anymore because they want me to verify my name.
am i the only one who thinks they don't deserve to know that information.
i fucking hate you all so much.
clones, easily led robots who will gladly do whatever they're told without questioning.
i fucking hate you. you make it horrible for the rest of us.

where are those who are dangling off the bottom of the pyramid.
i cannot see you with all the concrete in the way.
could you step out from behind wherever you're hiding, and let me see you.
better yet, could you find me on the street, and say hey, let's get stoned.

i know some of you have to deal with this stress, too.
i think it would be easier to deal with it together.

but i'm the only one who thinks that. no one else has the balls to tell me i'm wrong and prove it.

i fucking hate you.

this system was designed specifically to make life miserable for those who do not wish to participate, which is not only a monopoly, but it's a... i forgot the word.

i can't think anymore. my thoughts have been taken from me so many times. my tongue has been severed, truncated. i am so sick of this shit, and trying to beat my head through it.

i just want to die right now.
i want this life to end.
i want this life to be over.
i want this pain gone.
i no longer want to see any of you.
my heart has been too slaughtered.
there's not much left.
with the last of my life, i'd really like to live in comfort, but that's never going to happen.
i can't even achieve a minimal level of comfort, everything keeps knocking me down.

i fucking hate you.

i want to be free of your dollar hell.

i wrote a poem once. no one cared. and it's gone now.

but it was called 'god's gravity'.

and it told the story of living in poverty, and ended with the lines...

the only solution i can see from my hell,
is for your expensive heaven to fall.

no one cared. no one even ever heard it. no one gave a shit.

i've tried to seek out those songs with the powerful human lyrics. no one else does.

i fucking hate you.

i have to think. what can i do without facebook. that idea wasn't working anyway, it's better off dead. what do i do, how do i find people. there are other social networks.

google maps.
instagram.
meetup.com
bandmix.com
and what was i thinking of the other day.

homeless shit. phone calls. research. addresses, mapping, walking.

what else can i do, where can i post my writings to actually get a response of any kind.

is there a nonapathy.org.

this is so fucking miserable, and makes it worse being alone in this.

every single one of the rest of you are going to keep chasing those dollars till i make them fall alone, aren't you. you're going to ignore me up till the last possible moment.

and you wonder why i fucking hate you. i fucking hate you.

i wonder what people are thinking... you know, you have jobs, you have a boss telling you what to do, and you do it, for money. then we hear that humanity is about to be enslaved.

i've got one serious question. how much more of a slave do you think you have to become, in order to use that word more often.

does it not occur to you, you're already slaves. how much more control do you have to have taken away from you, to realize you're a slave. chains, smelly clothing, and lack of diet?

you're already a slave. admit it to yourself, and you'll feel better.

i fucking hate you. like little silly putty creatures easily stuffable into any mold. any little plastic box, cookie cutter, or crevice.

how do i find those who are not slaves. metalheads, potheads, hippies, geeks.

how do i find you. where are you. on the internet? anywhere besides facebook?

cause i know you're not there. you're too scared to use a social networking site.

you don't even know the reason for that. like wearing a foil hat as a fashion statement.

come on, think. where do i find the bigger minds, if they aren't on facebook.

mensa, bigthink, youtube, fuck it, we'll try youtube next.

i can't even download my naked news videos, the wifi is too slow, it keeps cutting off the files.

i can't download torrents, i can't use pidgin or iconpackager anymore, they're still taking my desktop away from me, after all these years, of what i've been able to keep. i'm just not allowed to be unique online. they force your identity out of you, and you don't realize why.

they don't deserve to know who you are. they certainly can't tell you who you are.

and they cannot take your intellectual property away from you just because you can't verify to them who you are. that is not their right, but they do it because you don't fight back.

you don't say a fuckin' thing.

slaves. clones. all of you.

now i can't use facebook anymore

one hour left, i have to keep writing. my mind is so numb, i have no one to tell, i feel sick, i'm in so much pain i can't finish that sentence, the pain is stopping my thoughts. who the fuck do i tell.

my company.

ozztek industries. the first thing i have to do, is create a new, evolved language. a language that's pregnant with high tech communicative possibilities. a simplified, universal language.

turn that into a programming language for computers, and start designing my own computer platform from the ground up, built on this new language. make the hardware capable of reading it. when it comes time for the operating system, i picture a little menu button tool, fully customizable, i call it ozztek. you can skin the button, to make it look however you want, function however you wish, whatever you want, it's your menu button. if you want the menu to have just chrome, music, and porn in the menu list, that's up to you. if all you do with computers is videogames, then why the fuck do you need an operating system. you're an idiot, and i despise your cloned existence, there's so much more to do on computers than games. i had a friend ask me once, 'if you don't do games, then what do you do on computers'. i said 'everything else'. you fucking moron.

you can use the menu to change your wallpaper, if you want a clock in the corner, you can pick whichever corner you want, design the clock, down to the colours and fonts, shading, everything. you can make it look however you want. i want to encourage people to have unique desktops.

all your desktops look the same. they look just like the inside of your cloned minds. cluttered with icons, temporary or unfinished projects, and at least one folder called 'New Folder', because you couldn't type in a name, or your cat hit the menu function on your keyboard, and you never deleted the empty 'New Folder' off your desktop, or you fucked something else up, to where you can't even delete the folder, i've had that happen before, i can't figure out what that moron did, but i know there are very few ways to get a folder to not delete. ever. sometimes, you're so gifted in your ignorance and your fuckups... oh, not to mention the tiny little picture you have stretched across your desktop, making it look grainy... you know you can download high resolution wallpapers fucking anywhere, right? you don't need a tiny thumbnail picture of your cat stretched across your desktop for all eternity. there are programs that will actually cycle your wallpapers in order, or in random order, you can even make playlists... you have no fucking clue what i'm talking about, i'm sure, so we'll move on.

i don't want to be responsible for an aneurysm today.

i hate your uncreative, unoriginal, nonunique desktops, i hate seeing the same thing every time i look at where your creativity is supposed to reside. wake the fuck up. how can i inspire you to be unique.

i hope my ozztek menu can do that, where i fail. imagine, putting whatever you want, wherever you want, on your desktop, and no one telling you you can't put it there, no error messages popping up anymore, the fuckin' thing just works, it functions, because there is no 'security' software fucking up everything you try to do, and having to provide administrator thumbprints to see your own files, or whatever microsoft intended, which i really don't give a fuck at this point.

this menu tool. ozztek. fully customizable, meaning it starts as the base operating system of just the menu that runs all your files. if you have a picture you want to view, if you have a song you want to hear, if you have a video you want to watch, no matter the format, ozztek just fucking plays it. it's fully customizable, so you can make the video appear however you want. all software for playing and editing files is already in the menu. this is how my desktop would look. when i boot up ozztek for the first time... actually...

when ozztek gets released, it will probly be just a download. i'll put it onto discs, so i can cram that little idea up aohell's ass, since i worked for them. that's just my own personal vengeance. but when you load the menu tool onto your desktop, it will pop up a little box, asking:

'Would you like to just close Windows?'

if you click yes, the windows taskbar disappears, but your winamp and google chrome stay open.

then, you drag the menu onto your desktop anywhere you want it. i would put mine in the upper left corner, and i would make it a small little rusted animated wheel gear thing. maybe a bee buzzing around it. or a ladybug. then, i would put a clock in my lower right corner of my desktop. i would have the fonts be some flat, high tech looking font, big numbers for the hour and minute, small numbers for the seconds, then i'd have the date under that in a pretty floral looking font.

then, i'd make a little weather gadget up in the upper right corner. it would have a nice little picture of the sun, and the temperature outside, in celsius, and when you mouse over the little arrow to the top right of the gadget, it would show a little pop up of what tomorrow's gonna look like. it would pop up a little alert if it's going to rain tomorrow.

then, i'd put a little picture frame with my personal pictures and some naked girls up in the upper left corner, and have it cycle the pictures every minute. then i'd change the wallpaper a few times, to get something nice looking. as high resolution as possible, so the clarity beats yours anyday.

i might even have more than one monitor, so keep that in mind while you're clicking away on your desktop icons, i have twice the desktop, and not one icon in sight.

then, i'd have a little media player gadget up in the middle of my desktop, that looks like an old vinyl record, with the album cover in it, and some beautiful fonts next to it, or underneath, saying the artist name, which i even hate when you call them artists, no, they're supposed to be metal bands, so it should say band name, which is where you would enter 'Disarmonia Mundi', or 'Strapping Young Lad', or 'Sonic Syndicate', not miley fuckin' cyrus. my music gadget... well... god, my thoughts are so severed.

anyway. that's about how my desktop would look. then, i'd hide a little touch notepad as the top pixel across the top of the desktop, i'd have an icon bar hidden on the right side, and my playlist of good music hidden on the left side. no taskbar, no need for it. i can minimize a program to wherever the fuck i want. i swear i just tore the skin on my ass, on this fucking hard seat in the mcdonald's. why can you not afford cushy seats.

anyway. integrated into the ozztek tool, is basically all the media playing software you could ever need. every codec, every editing tool, everything. all customization and media playing capabilities would be integrated into one part of the tool. i want to call it 'mood music'.

imagine.

when you walk into your home, you can say the words 'elegance, roses, mellow'...
you can say 'red, anger, heavy'...
you can say 'deftones, vagina, beauty'...

you can say whatever set of words you want.

'blue, feathers, soft'...

'pink, pearls, prince'...

you can say whatever the fuck you want.

and whatever you say, the computer will start playing music, and will change the colours, look, appearance, and texture of your desktop, putting on wallpapers that correspond to your words, playing songs that have anything to do with that mood.

in your music collection, you can go through and label certain things. for example.

the following songs:

'block' by machine head.
'oh, so surreal' by otep.
and 'skrying' by mudvayne.

all make me picture the same vision of concrete and city chaos. i'm synaesthetic, so i picture all sorts of shit you don't. but don't worry about that, just try to keep up.

those three songs all make me picture the same thing, and i like hearing them together.

so i would add a label to each of those songs, and i'd type in the word 'concrete'. later, if i found a desktop wallpaper that had any sort of visual that compares to what i see in those songs, i would add the tag 'concrete' to the image as well. overtime, the more you label and tag things, the more connections you'll see in your moods.

so if it's the middle of the day, and you're cleaning your house, and you need something heavy to get your energy going, you can say 'bright, heavy, speed', and it will instantly make a playlist of music, and start cycling wallpapers, and it will play songs that give you that energy to pick clothes up off the floor and spray the counter with lemon scented crap.

or, if you're coming home in the evening, from a long day of... not working... but you're tired, your wife is about half an hour behind you with the food, and you want to set the mood for her to walk into, you can say 'enya, calm, soft, blue', and it will start playing all your mellow, ambient music, it will change all the colours and lighting of your home to shades of blue... you see you really don't even need to say the words 'calm' and 'soft', cause that's already implied by 'enya' and 'blue'. and the first enya album it would put on, is shepherd moons, because it has the blue album cover. it would also play the first album by enigma, since there is some blue in the album cover. it would not be playing machine head's the burning red album, not even the intro track. it might play 'landing on the mountains of meggido' by down, or it might play 'heartbeat city' by the cars, depending on if you left the word 'soft' in your list.

if you're in a red mood, just say the colour red, it will play all your red music, and cycle all your red wallpapers. if you're in that particular mood, and porn just won't do it for you anymore, and your girlfriend just walked out the door for the last time, leaving you frustrated and unsatisfied...

you can say the word 'pussy', and maybe follow that with 'pink', or 'wet'.

it will start playing any music you have about pussy, which i don't recommend. it will start cycling all your wallpapers with naked ladies, and depending on which word you picked, 'pink', or 'wet'...

do i need to keep stating the obvious, and overexplaining this shit, i'm sure you get the idea by now.

i don't need to hold your hand like a little child and guide you through your own mind.

i had my own two kids i wanted to do that for.

i can't wait to invent this tool, because it would simplify so much, and make life easier.

it would also force microsoft and apple to implode, and realize what retarded, selfish losers they were.

trying to control people's desktops, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

you inspired zero uniqueness. and i can prove it by comparing any two desktops of any two people.

i see the computers that tony stark uses.

people sure as hell can't spell 'escape' correctly, but they can't even say it right anymore, they actually pronounce it 'excape'. you're just fucking retarded, and there's no excuse for you. if you say that word to the mood music tool, it will not play that song by metallica, on the ride the lightning album. and you'll hopefully feel like a fuckin' loser. which hopefully will inspire you to change yourself, and learn how the fuck to pronounce 'escape' properly, and spell it correctly, and put a fucking wallpaper on your desktop, maybe delete some icons. you're a fuckin' loser.

nevermind that.

when i see the computers that tony stark uses, i see not windows. i see the corpse of bill gates getting pissed on by winged cat creatures thousands of years from now. i see peace. freedom. beauty. simplicity. harmony.

i see an existence unsuffocated. unchained.

why not design a computer with all it ever needed to be. a menu. plays your files. simple.

design the menu however you want. you can have different functions for what happens when you mouse over the menu button, or when you click on it, or when you right click on it... imagine, three different menus coming out of one button, depending on how you click on it, or hell, you could set the hover effect to just be a little animation, to make the bee land on the flower if you want.

at that point, whoever said 'the only limitation is your mind', would finally be right.

you can even upload your screenshots and gadget creations for others to download.

but if any of you try to design the same desktop i have, i'll sue your ass back into the eighties.

don't clone yourself. define yourself.

ozztek industries.

it's about time to walk up to the library now. i fucking hate you people. but my brain feels lighter without that turd festering away in there. i give a fuck what any of you think. infact, i'm no longer talking to any of you, or responding to your shit. i'll just talk to myself, and get my ideas out of my head till i feel better. i'll do it sober, cause i can't ask anyone for weed, and i can't find a pothead nice enough to be a friend. i can't even have someone sober enough tell me where a better part of los angeles is, or where do i find my people.

the people who hate money. the people who hate other people, especially clones.

the other bill hicks fans.
hippies, metalheads, potheads... techie people.

where are you fucks!

i never feared animosity. not like you. what i fear is going backward.

dave mustardstain sang the lyric, 'a dark black past is my most valued possession'.

i always hated that line. fuck the past.

someone once said, 'what is past is prologue'.

i don't think it's even that. when we wake up and realize that we're all just braincells and neurons, we're going to look back on this past of calling ourselves humans as 'what the fuck were we thinking'.

you refer to the dark ages like it was a long time ago.

you're still walking your dog on a leash, asshole. you all are.

if i'm the only one stepping fearlessly into the future... what's the point.

i'm waiting for any of you to catch the fuck up, catch on, find me...

what the fuck do i have to do. i thought joining a marijuana group on facebook would accomplish something, because i thought, hey, there might be another pothead in that group that lives in los angeles, and might be nice enough to say, hey, you sound too sober, wanna hang out?

but that person is too busy being lazy and playing videogames.

i'll tell you right now, if you play videogames, you'll never be my friend.
if you've ever done meth, crack, or heroin, you're never going to be my friend.
if you have a bible in your sock drawer...
if you have icons on your desktop...

kinda reminds me of the 'you might be a redneck' thing.

if you've ever been a redneck... you're not on my shopping list this year.
if you've ever been violent, you won't be receiving a christmas present from me.

if you talk down to me, like i'm dumber than you... you're on my shitlist.

especially if you could actually read this thing. fuck it, time to walk.