now i can't use facebook anymore

one hour left, i have to keep writing. my mind is so numb, i have no one to tell, i feel sick, i'm in so much pain i can't finish that sentence, the pain is stopping my thoughts. who the fuck do i tell.

my company.

ozztek industries. the first thing i have to do, is create a new, evolved language. a language that's pregnant with high tech communicative possibilities. a simplified, universal language.

turn that into a programming language for computers, and start designing my own computer platform from the ground up, built on this new language. make the hardware capable of reading it. when it comes time for the operating system, i picture a little menu button tool, fully customizable, i call it ozztek. you can skin the button, to make it look however you want, function however you wish, whatever you want, it's your menu button. if you want the menu to have just chrome, music, and porn in the menu list, that's up to you. if all you do with computers is videogames, then why the fuck do you need an operating system. you're an idiot, and i despise your cloned existence, there's so much more to do on computers than games. i had a friend ask me once, 'if you don't do games, then what do you do on computers'. i said 'everything else'. you fucking moron.

you can use the menu to change your wallpaper, if you want a clock in the corner, you can pick whichever corner you want, design the clock, down to the colours and fonts, shading, everything. you can make it look however you want. i want to encourage people to have unique desktops.

all your desktops look the same. they look just like the inside of your cloned minds. cluttered with icons, temporary or unfinished projects, and at least one folder called 'New Folder', because you couldn't type in a name, or your cat hit the menu function on your keyboard, and you never deleted the empty 'New Folder' off your desktop, or you fucked something else up, to where you can't even delete the folder, i've had that happen before, i can't figure out what that moron did, but i know there are very few ways to get a folder to not delete. ever. sometimes, you're so gifted in your ignorance and your fuckups... oh, not to mention the tiny little picture you have stretched across your desktop, making it look grainy... you know you can download high resolution wallpapers fucking anywhere, right? you don't need a tiny thumbnail picture of your cat stretched across your desktop for all eternity. there are programs that will actually cycle your wallpapers in order, or in random order, you can even make playlists... you have no fucking clue what i'm talking about, i'm sure, so we'll move on.

i don't want to be responsible for an aneurysm today.

i hate your uncreative, unoriginal, nonunique desktops, i hate seeing the same thing every time i look at where your creativity is supposed to reside. wake the fuck up. how can i inspire you to be unique.

i hope my ozztek menu can do that, where i fail. imagine, putting whatever you want, wherever you want, on your desktop, and no one telling you you can't put it there, no error messages popping up anymore, the fuckin' thing just works, it functions, because there is no 'security' software fucking up everything you try to do, and having to provide administrator thumbprints to see your own files, or whatever microsoft intended, which i really don't give a fuck at this point.

this menu tool. ozztek. fully customizable, meaning it starts as the base operating system of just the menu that runs all your files. if you have a picture you want to view, if you have a song you want to hear, if you have a video you want to watch, no matter the format, ozztek just fucking plays it. it's fully customizable, so you can make the video appear however you want. all software for playing and editing files is already in the menu. this is how my desktop would look. when i boot up ozztek for the first time... actually...

when ozztek gets released, it will probly be just a download. i'll put it onto discs, so i can cram that little idea up aohell's ass, since i worked for them. that's just my own personal vengeance. but when you load the menu tool onto your desktop, it will pop up a little box, asking:

'Would you like to just close Windows?'

if you click yes, the windows taskbar disappears, but your winamp and google chrome stay open.

then, you drag the menu onto your desktop anywhere you want it. i would put mine in the upper left corner, and i would make it a small little rusted animated wheel gear thing. maybe a bee buzzing around it. or a ladybug. then, i would put a clock in my lower right corner of my desktop. i would have the fonts be some flat, high tech looking font, big numbers for the hour and minute, small numbers for the seconds, then i'd have the date under that in a pretty floral looking font.

then, i'd make a little weather gadget up in the upper right corner. it would have a nice little picture of the sun, and the temperature outside, in celsius, and when you mouse over the little arrow to the top right of the gadget, it would show a little pop up of what tomorrow's gonna look like. it would pop up a little alert if it's going to rain tomorrow.

then, i'd put a little picture frame with my personal pictures and some naked girls up in the upper left corner, and have it cycle the pictures every minute. then i'd change the wallpaper a few times, to get something nice looking. as high resolution as possible, so the clarity beats yours anyday.

i might even have more than one monitor, so keep that in mind while you're clicking away on your desktop icons, i have twice the desktop, and not one icon in sight.

then, i'd have a little media player gadget up in the middle of my desktop, that looks like an old vinyl record, with the album cover in it, and some beautiful fonts next to it, or underneath, saying the artist name, which i even hate when you call them artists, no, they're supposed to be metal bands, so it should say band name, which is where you would enter 'Disarmonia Mundi', or 'Strapping Young Lad', or 'Sonic Syndicate', not miley fuckin' cyrus. my music gadget... well... god, my thoughts are so severed.

anyway. that's about how my desktop would look. then, i'd hide a little touch notepad as the top pixel across the top of the desktop, i'd have an icon bar hidden on the right side, and my playlist of good music hidden on the left side. no taskbar, no need for it. i can minimize a program to wherever the fuck i want. i swear i just tore the skin on my ass, on this fucking hard seat in the mcdonald's. why can you not afford cushy seats.

anyway. integrated into the ozztek tool, is basically all the media playing software you could ever need. every codec, every editing tool, everything. all customization and media playing capabilities would be integrated into one part of the tool. i want to call it 'mood music'.

imagine.

when you walk into your home, you can say the words 'elegance, roses, mellow'...
you can say 'red, anger, heavy'...
you can say 'deftones, vagina, beauty'...

you can say whatever set of words you want.

'blue, feathers, soft'...

'pink, pearls, prince'...

you can say whatever the fuck you want.

and whatever you say, the computer will start playing music, and will change the colours, look, appearance, and texture of your desktop, putting on wallpapers that correspond to your words, playing songs that have anything to do with that mood.

in your music collection, you can go through and label certain things. for example.

the following songs:

'block' by machine head.
'oh, so surreal' by otep.
and 'skrying' by mudvayne.

all make me picture the same vision of concrete and city chaos. i'm synaesthetic, so i picture all sorts of shit you don't. but don't worry about that, just try to keep up.

those three songs all make me picture the same thing, and i like hearing them together.

so i would add a label to each of those songs, and i'd type in the word 'concrete'. later, if i found a desktop wallpaper that had any sort of visual that compares to what i see in those songs, i would add the tag 'concrete' to the image as well. overtime, the more you label and tag things, the more connections you'll see in your moods.

so if it's the middle of the day, and you're cleaning your house, and you need something heavy to get your energy going, you can say 'bright, heavy, speed', and it will instantly make a playlist of music, and start cycling wallpapers, and it will play songs that give you that energy to pick clothes up off the floor and spray the counter with lemon scented crap.

or, if you're coming home in the evening, from a long day of... not working... but you're tired, your wife is about half an hour behind you with the food, and you want to set the mood for her to walk into, you can say 'enya, calm, soft, blue', and it will start playing all your mellow, ambient music, it will change all the colours and lighting of your home to shades of blue... you see you really don't even need to say the words 'calm' and 'soft', cause that's already implied by 'enya' and 'blue'. and the first enya album it would put on, is shepherd moons, because it has the blue album cover. it would also play the first album by enigma, since there is some blue in the album cover. it would not be playing machine head's the burning red album, not even the intro track. it might play 'landing on the mountains of meggido' by down, or it might play 'heartbeat city' by the cars, depending on if you left the word 'soft' in your list.

if you're in a red mood, just say the colour red, it will play all your red music, and cycle all your red wallpapers. if you're in that particular mood, and porn just won't do it for you anymore, and your girlfriend just walked out the door for the last time, leaving you frustrated and unsatisfied...

you can say the word 'pussy', and maybe follow that with 'pink', or 'wet'.

it will start playing any music you have about pussy, which i don't recommend. it will start cycling all your wallpapers with naked ladies, and depending on which word you picked, 'pink', or 'wet'...

do i need to keep stating the obvious, and overexplaining this shit, i'm sure you get the idea by now.

i don't need to hold your hand like a little child and guide you through your own mind.

i had my own two kids i wanted to do that for.

i can't wait to invent this tool, because it would simplify so much, and make life easier.

it would also force microsoft and apple to implode, and realize what retarded, selfish losers they were.

trying to control people's desktops, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

you inspired zero uniqueness. and i can prove it by comparing any two desktops of any two people.

i see the computers that tony stark uses.

people sure as hell can't spell 'escape' correctly, but they can't even say it right anymore, they actually pronounce it 'excape'. you're just fucking retarded, and there's no excuse for you. if you say that word to the mood music tool, it will not play that song by metallica, on the ride the lightning album. and you'll hopefully feel like a fuckin' loser. which hopefully will inspire you to change yourself, and learn how the fuck to pronounce 'escape' properly, and spell it correctly, and put a fucking wallpaper on your desktop, maybe delete some icons. you're a fuckin' loser.

nevermind that.

when i see the computers that tony stark uses, i see not windows. i see the corpse of bill gates getting pissed on by winged cat creatures thousands of years from now. i see peace. freedom. beauty. simplicity. harmony.

i see an existence unsuffocated. unchained.

why not design a computer with all it ever needed to be. a menu. plays your files. simple.

design the menu however you want. you can have different functions for what happens when you mouse over the menu button, or when you click on it, or when you right click on it... imagine, three different menus coming out of one button, depending on how you click on it, or hell, you could set the hover effect to just be a little animation, to make the bee land on the flower if you want.

at that point, whoever said 'the only limitation is your mind', would finally be right.

you can even upload your screenshots and gadget creations for others to download.

but if any of you try to design the same desktop i have, i'll sue your ass back into the eighties.

don't clone yourself. define yourself.

ozztek industries.

it's about time to walk up to the library now. i fucking hate you people. but my brain feels lighter without that turd festering away in there. i give a fuck what any of you think. infact, i'm no longer talking to any of you, or responding to your shit. i'll just talk to myself, and get my ideas out of my head till i feel better. i'll do it sober, cause i can't ask anyone for weed, and i can't find a pothead nice enough to be a friend. i can't even have someone sober enough tell me where a better part of los angeles is, or where do i find my people.

the people who hate money. the people who hate other people, especially clones.

the other bill hicks fans.
hippies, metalheads, potheads... techie people.

where are you fucks!

i never feared animosity. not like you. what i fear is going backward.

dave mustardstain sang the lyric, 'a dark black past is my most valued possession'.

i always hated that line. fuck the past.

someone once said, 'what is past is prologue'.

i don't think it's even that. when we wake up and realize that we're all just braincells and neurons, we're going to look back on this past of calling ourselves humans as 'what the fuck were we thinking'.

you refer to the dark ages like it was a long time ago.

you're still walking your dog on a leash, asshole. you all are.

if i'm the only one stepping fearlessly into the future... what's the point.

i'm waiting for any of you to catch the fuck up, catch on, find me...

what the fuck do i have to do. i thought joining a marijuana group on facebook would accomplish something, because i thought, hey, there might be another pothead in that group that lives in los angeles, and might be nice enough to say, hey, you sound too sober, wanna hang out?

but that person is too busy being lazy and playing videogames.

i'll tell you right now, if you play videogames, you'll never be my friend.
if you've ever done meth, crack, or heroin, you're never going to be my friend.
if you have a bible in your sock drawer...
if you have icons on your desktop...

kinda reminds me of the 'you might be a redneck' thing.

if you've ever been a redneck... you're not on my shopping list this year.
if you've ever been violent, you won't be receiving a christmas present from me.

if you talk down to me, like i'm dumber than you... you're on my shitlist.

especially if you could actually read this thing. fuck it, time to walk.